As a programmer, it makes sense to raise one's kids on Linux. Not cause Linux is superior or anything. But because it's incredibly easy to screw with while they're away.
So they break a vase? Well I guess this Xorg package isn't really necessary.
Broke a window? Write a script that inverts their mouse movements randomly.
Cursed? Write a proxy that redirects all links to http://www.hasbro.com/mylittlepony/en_CA/
Fun part: Refuse to fix the problem, they have to themselves.
Fun part: Claim it's karma. Deny all involvement.
Fun part: They become paranoid of the karma fairy.
Fun part: They start antagonizing all computers.
Down side: At age 10, realizes it really is you.
Down side: At age 17, they're hacking NORAD.